Mass Stupidity

The Higgs Boson particle.

WHAT IS THE HIGGS BOSON/GOD PARTICLE?

A very very very very simplified description for very very very very simple people.

Note to my international followers: Flavoured wobbly gelatine desert stuff is called jelly in many countries, or Jello in America and Canada. Oddly, Jelly in America or Canada is often used to refer to jam preserves…

Anyway, for this explanation, the raspberry flavoured gelatine desert will be referred to as JELLY.

The Higgs Boson particle is like the jelly (or ‘jello’ … you get the picture…) in a trifle.

Without it, all the fruit and sponge would go everywhere.

The jelly holds it together…. BUT it doesn’t hold everything the same way. The ice cream and sprinkles can move around more than the sponge and fruit stuck in the jelly.

Now imagine adding hot fudge sauce. The steam from the hot fudge sauce isn’t slowed down by the jelly at all!

If the jelly stopped the hot fudge steam escaping, then the whole trifle would be a melted watery goo of messed up fruit, sponge, ice cream, sprinkles and hot fudge sauce!

Yet without the jelly, the whole mixture and all the ingredients would shoot off all over the place and never ever be a trifle….

The Higgs Boson jelly particle stops some ingredients in the universe from flying off all over the place, whilst letting other ingredients fly around doing what they need to do.

The trifle is the universe and everything in it.

Okay… That’s what effect the Higgs Boson has in the universe….

WHY IS IT CALLED THE GOD PARTICLE?

The Higgs Boson is named after Peter Higgs, a professor.

He’s not God. For one thing, Higgs is real.

The God Particle is just a nickname for the HIGGS BOSON particle. Scientists ‘guessed’ that the particle must exist, or else all of their calculations would be wrong.

They spent 60 years looking for it.

Imagine being blindfolded and sitting in a small boat in a swimming pool. You are absolutely sure that something is keeping you and the boat from sitting on the bottom of the swimming pool, but it takes 60 years to finally manage to untie the blindfold and see what it is. The water HAD to be there… you just couldn’t prove it.

It was tricky, hard work, frustrating…. and one scientific author nicknamed it “That Goddamned Particle“. The book editor didn’t like the sweary sounding name, so reduced it to ‘The God Particle‘.

It has NOTHING TO DO WITH GOD. Okay, apart from the word ‘god’.

In fact it has PROVED more science to be RIGHT… Thus undermining yet more religious based crap about how the universe was created.

So, to all you narrow minded, unintelligent, band waggon jumping religious idiots who are shouting from the temples and mosques “THEY’VE DISCOVERED THE GOD PARTICLE! I BET YOU ATHEISTS FEEL LIKE DICKS NOW!?!?”…. I’d like to say that no, we don’t…. because we aren’t idiots, and we actually bothered to find out what the Higgs Boson is all about, instead of jumping to conclusions and making ourselves look like sky pixie worshipping morons by going on the Internet and pouring scorn on people with stuff we have no idea about, just because it has the word GOD in it.

Note to cleverer people: Yes, I know….. but this is the simplest analogy I could come up with.

Thanks to @aurora446 for the proof reading of my recipe… 🙂